Love is Blind UK Finale Transcript
Hey Curt, so somebody woke me up really early this morning to watch the Love is Blind finales that dropped in America at 3am Thank you for not waking me up at 3 a
No, but it was a very exciting finale. We had made some videos and predictions. You can check it out on the MAYA blog about what would happen and what relationships and we got, I think about 80 % right on our predictions a week ago on who would go to the altar and say yes or no. And what'd you think of the final? Yeah, I think it was pretty we were on target. But I have to say I was surprised at what a nail biter it felt like even though I had predictions, even though we had discussed it.
There were moments that felt very tense for me and I was sort of anxious for these couples. Like we were really right there with them, right? Yeah. And I think the Demi part we nailed right away and she said it beautifully and how they just detached or with kindness and love from each other as opposed to the American versions that we, you know, of the show that we've seen. And I think Cat at the end, obviously the most controversial couple was saved till the end, almost got a whole 25 or 30 minutes and
You know, she had a line in there about being adopted. And Rosa didn't watch the show. was a common theme with this woman that she was adopted at 11 weeks old. And because of that, she needs a lot of attention. She needs a lot of external validation. She needs to be told how pretty or how great she is by her partner. And she openly acknowledges this. And it kind of struck me because it reminded me of a conversation we had had about the phrase, I love you,
And now people in relationships can use that as a excuse to do what they want, kind of whether you have boundaries or not. But it would be, I'm going to do X, Y, and Z. And if you complain, but I love you, but, and that's why I can get do it. And it's the same thing with an apology. So when you say, I am sorry, if there's a comma in the word, but next, it's not a true apology. That's still you holding onto some pain and wanting to transfer it. A true apology is just the statement. I'm sorry for X.
Y and Z with a period if you put a but in there, you're still not fully letting it go and giving that person closure. So if you're saying in this case, Catherine was I was adopted. So she has a whole discourse behind that at the age of 32 or 33. It's like, no, you're choosing that every day. You're very true. You were adopted at 11 weeks old, by the way. But now at 33, you're choosing to be this victim of it or this
personification of it that these things are now required of someone who I meet as a partner. So curious as to your take on putting a butt in an apology or an I love you or as a reason to act a certain way and falling back on that. Right. So Catherine's an interesting character in all of this. And we hold her up not to shame her because she's obviously in so much pain. We hold her up because we can all see that.
And I wish Catherine would come and do the MAYA program because quite frankly, she doesn't have to be in this much pain. She's carried it for long enough and it's time for her to just drop it to the side because it's really messing with her life and her happiness. She said another line in the finale where she said she needed a lot of reassurance. And she said very specifically, I'm adopted, therefore I need a lot of assurance.
And I think we can understand that. And honestly, as humans and as a woman in this world, I've needed assurance. I've had anxious attachment. I've been wary of dating. I've been worried about being rejected. think all of those things are just human feelings, but she very specifically has assigned this back.
to her being adopted. And it's a reason, but she's using it as an excuse and it's actually getting in her way. And she doesn't need to, like you will still be adopted. You will still have whatever baggage that comes with. And I can't understand it personally because I'm not adopted, but she also has an opportunity to say, and I've overcome this.
And so in order to do that, I see Catherine as somebody who needs to confront this pain and needs to ask it some questions and thoroughly investigate it and then ask herself, does it serve you? Like, what are you holding onto? Why are you holding onto this? What purpose does it serve in your life to hold onto this? And is it maybe a way to not get close to people? Is it a way for you?
to protect yourself or is it a way for you to make excuses so that you don't have to do the work yourself? Sometimes people don't want to do the work of getting well and it's understandable because that's hard work, right? But sometimes we look to other relationships to heal us, to complete us, to make us whole and it never works. Catherine can be made whole on her own if she does the MAYA program.
Yeah. And I agree that you hit the nail right on the head at the end. Like no one is out there, Freddie or another person to complete you to make you need these things from another person, right? For this attention or this, self validation, like, Nope, stop right there you don't. And you're right. Like millions of people are adopted. And I get an 11 weeks old. This was not later in life type thing. And there are much worse traumas, capital T's that people work through and get help for to have a
happy and pain free from that experience or work through it. And to carry that around in a burden, as we mentioned in another video, at this age to just constantly say, this is how I am. No, you choose every day to wake up and decide how you want to feel about being adopted and how you were treated in your adoption. So that's certainly workable where the next person, if it's not Freddie and they don't end up together as appears, they won't, at least as of today, is walking into like,
should know like, I'm not here to complete you, right? And I'm not here to validate you. You need to validate and complete yourself and then you won't be in the position asking someone to give something that they're not born to do or required to do. And Freddie wasn't even saying that this was an obstacle for him, know? And we're all kind of like, Freddie, red flag.
Maybe this should be an obstacle for you, but his whole thing was that they had different lifestyles. And then he wasn't sure after a short amount of time, if their lifestyles would mesh in the real world, that they just haven't been given the opportunity to see that through. I have a theory on why, and you've asked this question, why does Catherine still hold on so tightly to this adoption narrative? And my theory is that it actually is the source of her pain.
And not because in and of itself, it was this terrible thing. Obviously she was adopted by a loving couple that really loves her. And we don't know the ins and outs of their life, but from what we've seen, she was very much wanted and she has a loving mom and dad. The thing that's happened with Catherine is that she has re-traumatized herself by reliving this thing that she actually doesn't have a real memory of because she probably can't.
right, from 11 months old, she has created an entire narrative around it. Sorry, 11 weeks old. Not even 11 months, I hear you. 11 weeks old. So she's created an entire narrative around it and she has played it in her head over and over and over again. And anytime I think Catherine's like frontal lobe, her executive functioning, wants to say, Catherine, we're kind of awesome. We're beautiful inside and outside. We're really nice to people. We're caring and loving.
think we're okay. This primitive part of her brain shuts it all down and says, actually, no, we're not remember that thing that happened. And the answer is no, you don't remember the thing that happened. But she's re traumatized herself. And that is why 30 something years old, it is as if it happened yesterday. Yeah, wearing it like a scarlet letter where she just would literally walk into a bar and I'm adopted. I'm adopted. You got to know I'm a dot like
Okay, probably three other people in the bar might have come from foster or been adopted at some point. and that I will give Freddie super props. If you watch the show at the end, he says, obviously, I guess you can figure out, not getting married at the altar the shows out. but he goes and talks to her parents. Of course it's her adopted parents, but he goes in the room and actually talks to her. And I have never seen that. And that takes courage because you know, you're not very popular, regardless of if it was the right decision or not. You just broke her heart and that's their daughter.
He goes and talks to her parents, explains himself in a very gentleman, classy, honest way, and then goes and talks to her in the room of the absolute heartbreak. So Freddie is by far a stand up, honest, good human being and did what was right for him and her. If he's not ready, then they're not ready. So he did the right thing. And then went and actually had the compassion and empathy to talk to the three most hurt people in the world by that decision.
and explain himself in a very kind and loving way. So props to Freddie. I'm sure he'll do okay in life. Yeah. Yeah. Freddie has 138 ,000 followers on Instagram, like three or four or five times as much as any of the other cast members. think Freddie's doing just fine. And I saw a photo of him earlier walking in London. It seemed pretty happy. crowd, like the Beatles with a crowd of 35 women chasing you about, yeah. Probably. Right. Right.
All right, we'll wrap it up there. Good job, Freddie. That's our summary. Love is Blind UK, season one. That's a wrap.
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